Hi everyone! Sorry it's been awhile since I've updated the blog.
First, an update on my Journeyman progress. I am still working on the application (It's quite extensive). There are a number of things going on with that. The IMB voted to change the financial policies, so it's looking like I will have to raise quite a lot of financial support in order to go. I believe God is in control of the situation and please pray that I wouldn't consider the financial issue a real problem; if God wants me to go, he will provide, and money is not an issue to to God. On that note, David Platte, the new IMB president, has actually put that new financial policy on hold, so there's a chance that I won't end up needing to raise that money.
Spiritually, I've had an interesting past month or so. There are moments where I just feel completely overwhelmed with God's presence, and moments where I feel really alone. I've been reading a guy named Henri Nouwen, who actually writes quite a lot about loneliness and aloneness. He says that "many people deal with [aloneness] through loneliness. That means you experience your aloneness as a wound, as something that hurts you, makes you miserable. It makes you cry out, "Is there anyone who can help me?" Loneliness is one of the greatest sources of suffering today. It is the disease of our time." He goes on to say that "As Christians we are called to convert our loneliness into solitude. We are called to experience our aloneness not as a wound but as a gift - as God's gift - so that in our aloneness we might discover how deeply we are loved by God." This isn't to argue against any sort of community, it's just to say that "it is precisely where we are most alone, most unique, most ourselves, that God is closest to us." Nouwen says that from this state of solitude that we can then truly reach out to other people and form really solid community.
So, in this past month, I've been trying to convert that aloneness that I feel into solitude with God, and for the most part, I feel as if I've connected with God in a deeper way. Scripture especially is beginning to move me more emotionally and I think spiritually. Let me share a verse with you that I've found particularly moving. John 1:12 reads:
"ὅσοι δὲ ἔλαβον αὐτόν, ἔδωκεν αὐτοῖς ἐξουσίαν τέκνα θεοῦ γενέσθαι, τοῖς πιστεύουσιν εἰς τὸ ὄνομα αὐτοῦ."
"But to all who received him and believed in his name, he gave authority to become children of God."
When I read this verse, I was just overcome with how incredible that is. God, the creator of all things, the supreme Authority, has actually given us authority, the right, to become his children. This means I can come to Him as my father. I can approach him and talk to him about anything. I can tell him about my problems, and you know what, he'll love me regardless. I can, as the parable goes, take my inheritance, squander it, and in my greatest moment of despair, decide to return back to him, who will be actively waiting for me to come home and welcome me home with the 'fattened calf' and a big party. This verse has really helped me understand my faith in a more intimate and personal way, and I'm so thankful for God my Father.
Please pray for continued solitude with God my Father and Jesus my Savior and the Spirit my Helper.
Please pray for the different levels of community that I have with other people. Pray that I could share Christ and be a light to both believers and nonbelievers.
Please pray that I can be diligent in my schoolwork and my swimming and my applications to Journeyman and grad schools.
Thank you all.
"Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy, to the only God, our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion and authority, now and forever! Amen."
